41 days of Solitude

Can u believe Mom, Its been 41 days!!!!

:( Went to church in morning ....Dad is going to Pune today, he needs a change of place, dono when he is coming back. Nobly is confused about what to do with his future and me as usual still searching for what I am supposed to do :). MCA exams are on top of my head, I freaked out and thinking of dropping MCA.
Its too tough maa..all these maths stufss!!phewww.... I hate maths
 Sad news is Kevz gone.. Alphy on d way to go...Punya goin back to tvm...
All are leaving me.. I know they all are doing it for a good purpose and I am happy for each of them, still a little sad. Friends come and go ryt, but their impacts in heart stays forever.

So hows it like out there? Tell me about when you are free from your buzy schedule! Lookin to hear from u

Luv,
Mebz

Mothers Day

Hey Maa..

Happy Mothers Day...Time is flying by rite?? I still remember when we were in Dubai , I used to make stupid cards for you and you liked them no matter how sick those were :). I really missed you mumma, everyone was talking about mothers day and even facebooking how much dey love their mom and wat all they did :( I got jealous ...

Sunday when I was standing in the Cemetery,  I almost felt like you were near me, I could hear you calling me "Mone" :( ...I didn't concentrate anything for mass, was thinking about you only ...I only wish to see you once more...I know its not possible :( , but nothing is impossible for Jesus ryt?? And you are with him :) So please ask him.......

Luv,
Mebz

My Hero

Hold your loved ones close,
Let go of your egos,
Once the time you have is gone,
 It’s gone
Time waits for none
I keep telling myself, If only she had more time!!
I pray to God,to roll back time,
I will pay for every second with a dime
No it’s too late,
Again its my fate.
Heart is flooded with pain,
Tears come down like rain
What if it changes??
Mind is stuck up with “what if”
Cancer, the dreaded "C" word,
Who I think is a coward.
Mom fought you till the end,
not losing her mind
Salute to my bravest Soldier,
Who will always be my HERO!!

Chalakudy day

Hi Mom ,

Hope you are having a good time watching over us. I have joined back in Office. Its really boring you know, cant concentrate properly. Hope I will be like before soon. Great news is that we went to Chalakudy on May 1st, St.Joseph's Day at Meloor church. Dad also came along. After you went for the first time he stepped out of home. Nobly cudnt make it as he had an exam on 2nd May. We had a good time there. Valsa Aunty was saying you always wanted to see one of these celebrations, even though you couldnt make it I know you would have been looking from above. Or you can see them through my eyes mumma. Its still a mystery that you are not there mumma, everyone has coped to the fact that you are gone forever, except for me. somehow I cant digest it. I like to think you are there around me :)

This weekend we are planning for an outing Mumma. Will be our first outing without you. Theres no point in saying will miss you, cuz I already do so now.

Lot of things to tell you, for now me going...

Luv,
Mebz

Complaints to Heaven!!!

Dear Mom,

My heart cries because you are not here anymore,

I miss your loving arms in which I used to cuddle,

I miss the fun times we had,

I miss your scoldings at times,

I miss your cooking, you made so many wonderful dishes for us,

Your voice is no longer heard in the house,

You're still my mother, even if you are not here on earth anymore.

I hope you are enjoying your new life in heaven,

I know you are with your parents,

They will take care of you like you did here for us.

I am glad you feel no more pain and no more suffering,

I just could not see you in pain any more,

I know you feel no more sadness,

I know you can now see and hear us unlike before,

I know you no longer have memory loss like before,

Today I feel this pain when I have memories of you,

I know you would want me to be happy,

It is difficult to do this sometimes.

I missed your hug when I stepped up in my career,

Christmas will never be the same without you,

How will I buy a surprise gift for your bday?

We had planned to celebrate your 25th Wedding Anniversary, 

Without you dad is so alone.

My birthday, you won't be there to make my fav food,

Vacations will not be the same without you.

Who do I ask for advice in the future when I have my own children?

You promised me to look after them Mom....

I know I may sound selfish 

I miss you mom and I wish you could have stayed with us a little bit more.

Jesus,Please take care of her,

Also if you ever feel busy,do send her back to me,I'l look after her.

I know you are busy with Jesus now,

I will see you someday when I come stand by Jesus.

Love,

Mebz